Are We Really Living in a Real Life ‘Adult Mean Girls’?

What is the meaning of being a bully exactly?

Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally and excluding someone from a group on purpose.

What a weekend I had a few weeks ago!! There were for sure lots of emotions and some of them were big - REAL big! It will never cease to amaze me how childish and clique-y people can be regardless of their age. I would've thought that once I was out of high school the "mean girls" era would end. At the very least, I'd have thought it would've stopped by my thirties. Grown women AND men should NOT be bullying others in any way, shape or form.

As parents, we teach our kids(at least I was taught this way and I sure as hell teach mine) NOT to be bullies and to treat everyone the same. To make sure everyone is included that wants to be. It doesn't matter their opinion on things or their physical limitations, or whether they come from a different background or home life than you do. Treat them the same way you do everyone else. Yet, here I am being victim to bullies at almost forty years old. Something is wrong here y'all.

I'm likely going to ruffle some feathers here with these examples, but I'm not writing this to call anyone out or anything like that. I'm just trying to understand why things like this are actually happening.

I've noticed a big issue with this involving not just me but a friend of mine as well at a bar we like to frequent and this isn’t the first time I’ve felt pushed out of there either. Everything was great until one of us (me) stopped seeing a "regular." Because my friend and I were "new regulars" that meant that we were now outsiders. If one conversation gets misconstrued - everyone turns on the outsiders right? Grown people should not be bullying others into staying away from places or other people just because they've known them or gone there longer. I'm not saying every person there is a bully, but when ninety percent of them make you feel tense and unwelcome and disrupt the peace you've worked so hard for - that's no longer a place I want to give my business nor my time to.

I'm WELL aware that I'm not everyone's cup of tea. I'm more like a glass of vodka or a shot of tequila. I'm definitely hard to handle in a romantic relationship and apparently women don't appreciate my friendship much either because I've heard I'm intimidating and I'm "the prettier one." In my eyes, none of this is a reason to bully anyone, nor do I think I or anyone should apologize for any of the above. However, I'm not completely heartless...

One of the biggest problems I have with this whole epidemic we'll call it, and I'm probably not alone - is that I have a huge heart! So if someone I care deeply for is bullying me, yes, I get upset by that, but at the same time if I know that they are going through something in their life that's causing them to hurt then I want to be there for them through whatever it is. Even if they did just tell me to f*&^ off. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt one time, and keep my opinions to myself, but they do it again? Peace out girl scout! That's my toxic trait I guess.

This all brings up a song that everyone should listen to and remember called 'Be Kind' by Zak Abel; in it he sings about disregarding a person's status, gender, views, etc., and simply wishes for kindness in return for his own.

Stop worrying SO much about what other people are doing in or with their lives and focus on living and enjoying your own. You don't get a do over. Be happy with the life you're making.